I never intended to take so much time off and basically go missing in action, but here we are. I’ve always been very transparent and real with all of you and I’ll continue to do that. These last few months have been quite the whirlwind. Here’s that you missed.
Well for starters, I got a full time job outside the house. Seems crazy with all I do right (ptc, work 2 jobs from home, juggle marriage, 2 kids, etc), but here we are. With the way the world is right now and this virus, I can’t volunteer at the school and I’m not sure where that leaves me with the ptc since we can’t go into the school. I guess you could say since I had some free time I needed to fill it. Haha! I was a stay at home mom for five and a half years before getting back into the workforce, I work graveyard, and my job is very physical. I guess I forgot what all went into working outside the home and everything that goes with it. It has been a huge adjustment and so exhausting. I finally feel like I’ve adjusted to the work, schedule, and trying to juggle everything in life.
My mom decided to live her dream and moved to Montana. I of course selfishly wanted her to stay because I don’t know life without her and she’s always been no more than 15-20 minutes away. I’m happy for her though, she’s living the dream and she loves it there. It’s a weird feeling knowing she’s 12 hours and nearly 700 miles away now. That’s a big difference than the 15-20 minute drive to her house.
Shortly after my mom moved, my sister and my nieces moved to Montana too. If you have a sister, you know the relationship has its upside and downs, its love and hate, our relationship was no different. We didn’t always get along, but I love her and my nieces so much. I was sad when they moved. It was like my whole family was leaving and I wouldn’t get to see them again. We keep in touch, but some days the phone calls and texts just don’t feel like enough. More recently my brother also moved up there. I miss them all so much.
Right after my mom moved to Montana, the kids and I took a trip up there. Our first away vacation in years. The trip itself felt like it took forever as we drove there, but the views along the way were amazing. Not much to see through Washington, but Idaho was gorgeous and Montana is on another level of beauty. We helped my mom get all settled in unloading the moving truck and unpacking, saw all the sites, and did a little shopping. I even had the chance to drive another 7 hours to meet my best friend who lives in North Dakota that I haven’t seen in over a year. It was an amazing, fun filled trip.
After spending 8 days in Montana, I was all to excited to get back home. Montana is beautiful, but it didn’t feel like home to me, even with my family there. I think it was because my husband was back home. When we got home, I was surprised with a bedroom makeover. While we were gone, my husband apparently was so bored that he gave our bedroom a makeover. He painted to walls, picked out new curtains, bought a new decorative sign, and bought a new headboard. It was a nice surprise to come home to and something I’ve wanted to do for a while.
In September I celebrated my 32nd birthday. Honestly I was not looking forward to turning 30 or being in my 30s, but it isn’t any different. My 30s so far have been the best years of my life. Remember with 30 comes not caring and it feels so freeing to not give a f**k about anyone or anything they have to say. So yeah I’m a little older now, probably a little more crazy, but definitely more carefree than ever. I’m just out here trying to live the best life I can and I’m absolutely obsessed with it. I love my 30s.
More recently this month, I was in a car accident on my way home from work. I got very lucky and it was definitely scary. I wasn’t injured thankfully and now we’re just waiting to hear from the insurance company about getting my car fixed. I have noticed, driving freaks me out a bit more than it did. I think that’s just because it’s still so fresh. Usually Thanksgiving is spent at my moms house with my whole family and what feels like a million kids running wild. It looked nothing like that this year. I worked the night before arriving home at 6am and heading to bed as my husband was waking up to start cooking. It was just my husband, the kids, and myself. It was quiet house and honestly I missed the chaos.
Over the last few months there’s been tears, laughs, sadness, happiness, and frustration. I’ve missed my family. I’ve worked myself to the point of exhaustion. I’ve felt lonely and isolated because it felt like all I was doing was working and my family feels so far away. My mental health has been up and down. I became overwhelmed with everything I took on and struggled to find a balance. I’m still learning to say no and let go of all the things I don’t need or want to be doing. Overall life has been a rollercoaster, but I’m taking it one day at a time and doing my best always.
Sassy Mamaroo 