Wow life has just been going on full force over here. I’m working full time for the first time in what feels like forever, while also juggling Sassy Mamaroo, a part time job, mom life, and my wifely duties. It feels like there is never enough time in a day to get done what I need and never enough time to sleep. I’m always tired, but we’re adjusting to our new daily lives.
My kids are getting out of school for the summer this week, which will definitely help ease some of the craziness. When I had decided to go back to work I hadn’t taken into consideration how it would overall affect everyone and everything. All I thought about was getting a babysitter for the one day we needed it, which one of us would be taking the kids to school on which days, and keeping up with my 2 other jobs. It wasn’t like I hadn’t thought about my kids during the process, I just didn’t think about how they would be affected. My son is fine with it. He doesn’t care about much other than video games and school ending. My daughter on the other hand is having a harder time.
You see she was 4 when I decided to stay home. I’ve been home ever since. She doesn’t remember me working. She has no memories of me not being here or wherever she needed me to be when she needed me. Any time she needed me I was there without hesitation. I was even there when she didn’t need or want me there. Not just at home, but at the school. I was at all the award assemblies, field trips, after school programs, and even in the hallway volunteering. Now I’m only home 3 days a week. The other days I’m sleeping until I have to go back to work. That’s a lot of change. The last year has been full of change.
Covid came in with a bang changing the way the kids went to school. Even the last few months being back in school, nothing was the way it was before. Now I’m working and not here when she needs me. She is a sensitive soul. She cries if I leave without saying goodbye and giving her a kiss. She sleeps on my side of the bed so that when I get home and wake her up she can give me a hug and a kiss and tell me how much she misses me. I call her on my breaks when I can and never leave without a proper goodbye. I know working is what’s best right now and I hope she can learn to see that. Adjusting has been hard. I never expected it to be easy, but I didn’t expect this. We are taking it one day at a time and doing the best we can.